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Friday afternoon I had a few minutes in between commitments
so I ran to Burlington coat factory to try on just a few things that my closet
has been lacking. Perhaps this shopping trip
was one that the Lord planned specifically for my benefit because I had quite
the epiphany while I was there. In the
fitting room no-less!
While I was trying on a few things, I heard a woman in
the room next to me muttering to herself.
I will own up to the fact that I intentionally tried to hear what she was saying. I have excellent hearing -- and I sometimes
employ that skill to things such as eavesdropping. {I have no shame.} Anyway,
this woman was muttering to herself some of the most hateful things. I was
stunned by the strength of her language and the emotion behind her words. But
most of all, I was stunned by the fact that she these hateful phrases were
quite obviously directed toward herself.
Now I know that the fitting room often doesn’t bring out
the best in people, but really? What good can possibly come of that negative
and torturous self-talk?
Hearing that poor woman shred herself up was horrible to
listen to, and now I really wish I had waited around the fitting room so I
could pay her a compliment or maybe just give her a hug. (She probably would
have been so creeped out…. Ummmm I heard you in the fitting room and I just
wanted to say that you are beautiful!...... Beyond creepy, really.) But outside
that, I felt so convicted. I have had those same thoughts about myself before. Her
words have been my thoughts.
And what good has ever come of those thoughts? Nothing. Nothing at all! In fact, that type of self-talk has been a
strong and merciless enemy in my life. (Thankfully, I feel that I've been victorious
in my battle against this enemy recently.
For the moment she’s splayed out face-down in the mud; and I’m pretty
sure she’ll have a snazzy black eye for a while. Okay, that’s enough imagery.)
So here is what I’ve been thinking: BE KIND. Be kind to
yourself. Treat yourself with tenderness and delicacy because you are beautiful.
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(Or handsome… if there are any men out there brave enough
to read this estrogen-infused blog. You rock. :)
Oh yes - learning to do be kind to myself. I have said a lot of hateful things to myself in a dressing room - or in front of the bathroom mirror. Then I read an article recently about moms of daughters needing to not call themselves fat, ugly, etc. and I thought that also pertained to moms of boys, too - for the same reasons and different ones.
ReplyDeleteAlso - I liked your imagery of the enemy in the mud.